I found my early days as a mum challenging, and it seems like I want the only one.
So when I was feeling better, I decided I wanted to do anything I could to help other mums to feel good, too.
So I printed a bunch of cards like this:
If you’ve recently received one of these cards, maybe from someone on the bus or someone you know or in the office kitchen, this page and this message are just for you.
No matter what you’ve been through, no matter what you’re going through, no matter what you’re facing…
You’re doing a great job, and you can do this.
You can be doing everything right and still find motherhood hard.
For me, motherhood means recovering physically and mentally from a challenging pregnancy and a traumatic birth experience.
My baby didn’t sleep, so I didn’t sleep. She’s not a baby anymore, but we still don’t get much sleep.
My baby cried about 6 hours a day for 12 weeks, until I doubted whether I would ever recover from the torture of not being able to solve whatever was bothering her.
I had support from family, but being a primary carer was still really hard.
I had faith that God would help me every day, and he did, but I still felt exhausted.
I had a co-parent I was married to, but I still felt like a crap partner. In between comparing how cute we thought our daughter was, we just fought constantly.
About how to best care for her.
About whose turn it was to get up with her in the night, and who should do more chores.
About who would go back to work full-time and who would a career break to care for her in her first year.
About whether she should go to daycare or not.
About whether to do a family Christmas, a first birthday party, or even just have friends over.
But life is so much better now than it has been, and each stage has different challenges but I feel more equipped to deal with them as they come.
I pray you find this encouraging.
I pray you get any help you need, and ask for help when you need it.
And just know – mama, you’re doing a great job.
Bless you – from TJ